Graduation Day.

Today was graduation day.  I watched this morning as my husband carried our two little boys down the streets of Charleston and into the church with him.  Avett in one arm, Griff in the other.  We watched and waved as daddy marched proudly with his class.  Chad's parents flew out for the occasion, and how nice it was to have them sitting beside us.  Watching Chad throughout this day, I couldn't help but think of every step that he had taken to get here. Every hard thing we did together.  Every good moment, every miracle that got us through.  I could not hold back tears- there's a shocker.  I am so proud of Chad and how hard he worked when the going got really tough.  When the going sometimes felt impossible.  

When we started this journey over 2 years ago, I had one crawling baby and another growing inside of me.  Today they were both toddlers, waving and looking for daddy during his big ceremony.  I can't quite wrap my head around it yet, that this has all actually happened.  That this phase is ending.  I've grown used to the student way of living, I've adjusted.  Now here comes life wanting to change it all up on me again.  With change comes uncertainty and more bumps in the road, bumps that I admit I'm not ready for yet.

We've lived here in the South long enough that "y'all" has become a part of my daily vocabulary.  It snuck up on me. And now I've embraced the Southern talk because it's much easier than explaining to the locals why I wasn't raised saying things like, "all y'all".  Griff even notices.  He calls me out on it.  "Mama, I not y'all, I just Griff."

We love this city.  We love our beach.  We love our friends.  But it's more than that.  I brought a new born baby home to this apartment.  Here I've struggled.  I've learned how to be a mom to two at once and watched as they have grown into best friends.  Here we have learned how hard it is to be without family or community at arms reach.  Here we have created friendships to last a lifetime.  Here, we have battled sickness and seen healing miracles.  Here, we have found strength in each other.

I am so incredibly blessed to have these guys by my side.  I'm so thankful for the love that continues to flourish in our family.  And, on the days when I feel like I'm not enough- all three of them are there picking me up and giving me purpose.

Chad, I am so proud of you and your sacrifice for our family.  Today of all days, Chad was da-da first and distinguished graduate second.  He never ceases to impress me.

Waterfront Park.

It's one of our places we love to go for a good stroll.  The long pier stretches out underneath the Ravenel bridge and into the Charleston Harbor.  Sunsets here are amazing over the water.  The boys love to run wild through the park.  We often meet Chad here after a long day at work for a picnic dinner.  Some weekends if we are really adventurous, we walk the bridge and look for dolphins.  The bridge itself is sort of famous, says my structural-engineer-brother-in-law.  For me, this is the kind of place I can come and just be still.  The kind of place where I can take a minute to breathe and listen.  I remember distinctly a certain day in November, the first year we lived here, Griff and I went for a sunset walk along the pier.  Chad was at home studying for finals and I was about 37 weeks pregnant, about to go into labor any second with Avett.  I remember relishing that walk, thinking about how this would be the last time I would have just one baby with me.  We watched the orange and red sun go down over the harbor as I waddled along half way chasing, half way carrying 18 month old Griff.  We have come here many times since then and every time I feel lucky.  Lucky that this is the place where we get to live, if only for a short time.  Charleston, I really love you.

a new year.

2011 was full of surprises.  i feel like it passed us by at warp speed.  in february, i married my sweetheart and best friend.  our ceremony was simple, honest, hopelessly romantic and... perfect.  the two of us promised to love and take care of one another- no matter what.  in june, we welcomed our little son into the world.  I think i have sufficiently freaked out over enough baby what ifs and what to dos to last a life time.  its hard times when you have no idea how to take care of the infant in your arms.  the hospital staff handed him to me and i thought, okay, now where is my manual please?  luckily, i used my mommy powers and figured most of it out- along with the help of baby 411.  that book is a god send, ps.  griffin is our everything; our sunshine on those cloudy days.  i can't even begin to describe the way i feel about becoming a mother.  i am truly blessed to have this perfect experience.  this year- with the new men in my life, my heart has felt things that i never knew existed.  I feel emotion with a greater understanding and perspective and- gratitude- and... happiness.  More than ever, I am determined to enjoy every single day- every moment, even the hard stuff.  There is plenty of hard stuff, ehh?  Understatement.  Life is so precious and continues to move ahead at an alarming rate.  I don't want to miss a single second of it.  I love it.

Our family is changing and growing.  Griffey is sleeping through the night- uninterupted, as of this week!  um, yay.  He's learning how to sit up and entertain himself without mommy.  he rides in the cart at stores and sits in high chairs at restaurants.  it's all quite adorable.  Chad has applied to Occupational Therapy programs throughout the country in hopes of being accepted into a graduate program.  i have of course, been his personal assistant through this process- aka i did all the paperwork and organizing.  let me tell you, in terms of 6 grad applications, there's a lot of paperwork.  and organizing.  and, i think i have my life back now that it's over.  now we wait...and wait.  None of these programs are in utah and it looks as though we could be packing up and moving in time for the fall semester (fingers crossed).  although it will be hard to say goodbye, new adventures await and we are excited.  we will have more news hopefully by mid-march.  my fingers are seriously crossed.  and toesies too.

We drove to california for chirstmas- via the civic.  babies and road trips together are like, my least favorite thing.  maybe, holiday traffic in and out of the vegas is worse.  i did however, love the beach in december!  the weather was unbelievably lovely and it was the first time griff had ever been to the beach.  we put his toes in the water and you know, freaked because we had no sunscreen and my baby is like, the fairest of fair.  that was kind of one of those magical moments though, seeing my two boys playing in the water.  i will insist that my baby loves the beach- and hopefully, we get to go more often- with our sunscreen.  our trip was cut short with some sad news about our dear friend Sarah Songer-Smith.  her battle with cancer came to an end just after christmas and we said goodbye to her on the eve of the new year.  her passion and great zest for life has remained with me as i've reflected on my time spent with sarah.  i have heard her encouraging spirit just about every day since her passing, pushing me and convincing me i can do things that i wouldn't ordinarily take on.  that was her way.  even in the short time i knew her, courage and strength always stood out.  we love you sarah.  you indeed, broke the mold.

And so, we move into another year- full of promise and excitement and... snow.  yes, it's been dumping snow this week.  perfect for skiing (you know, if i had the money, time and gear for such things) and hopefully, more blog posts. :)  happy new year.  make it a good one.

ps- as always, thanks to miss Lydia Gravis for the photography. 

      

we hope they let us in.

hi guys.  we've been all sorts of busy around here this week.  Chad took his big graduate school test- GRE yesterday.  It was pretty brutal for him taking this 4 hour test after working all day-but we think he did pretty well.  Now, on to the applications.  As it stands (and we've debated for months on every possible school; these are based on cost, acceptance rate, and final exam pass rates) our top 4 schools are:

UTAH

IDAHO STATE

UNIVERSITY OF NORTH CAROLINA

MEDICAL UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH CAROLINA

can you guess which ones are mama's top choices?  I'm of course pulling for UNC or MUSC.  however, the U and ISU would give us in state tuition and just seem a bit easier right now.  and then there is the thought that we may not get in to any of those, which would just be dreadful- so i won't even continue to speak of such nonsense.  the right school will make itself known, we hope :)  I'm so proud of my hard working husband!  

the deadlines.

* You can find Griff's cute bear hat here, by Emmamade.